Rebuilding a life after addiction isn’t easy. Addressing the physical and psychological issues that caused your substance abuse in the first place is an around-the-clock battle in many cases. Combined with the pressure of providing for your needs and those of your family, it can feel like too much to bear. To minimize stress and frustration that could threaten your sobriety, you must be patient, both with the process and with yourself. Here are three tips that can help tilt the odds in your favor.

Tip #1: Have a Plan for When You Travel

Traveling presents special challenges for people trying to stay sober, according to Psychology Today. So have a plan in place before you depart. It should include these guidelines:

Choose your destination with care. Fortunately, there are many excellent getaway locales for people who are in recovery, according to USA Today. You really can have fun without drugs or alcohol!
Traveling for work is a bit more challenging, since you may have little...

Is there REALLY such a thing as an argument-free relationship? Sure, we’ve all heard friends or acquaintances say, oh we never fight. But it’s also evident they avoid real conversations that may inevitably lead to an argument. They keep it surface level.

I’m talking about couples who don’t hold back. They aren’t afraid to tell their partner what they’re thinking and feeling.

Dr. John Gottman says there are four types of conflict that tend to be relationship killers. In fact, he calls them the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. So you can only imagine that his description of these four relationship killers isn’t exactly sugar-coated. The Four Horsemen are known as the following:

1. Criticism: a complaint about a certain behavior

2. Defensiveness: self-protection in the form of acting righteous or innocent

3. Contempt: saying something that makes you sound superior

4. Stonewalling: withdrawing from the conversation

All four of these types of...

SUMMARY

• Couples who lack clarity in their relationship struggle in understanding and empathy towards meeting each other's goals (i.e. relationship, finances, career, etc.)

• Couples who lack clarity lack purpose in their relationship
• "Checking-In" on a consistent basis is key to helping you move step-by-step towards your common shared goals
• There are 4 Primary Questions to "check-in" with your partner to help focus your vision and outcome for what you want to accomplish in the present and future of your relationship. Zach learned these questions from Brendon Burchard. 
  1. What are we trying to accomplish this year? 
  2. How do we need to do to double our ______? 
  3. What strategies have we done before that worked and didn't work? 
  4. What holds us back the most?  

SIGN-UP TODAY TO HELP BRING MORE CLARITY INTO YOUR RELATIONSHIP. DOWNLOAD THE 5 HABITS OF SUCCESSFUL COUPLES NOW!

The 5 Habits of Successful Couples

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by: Zachary Lee

When you think of all of the different stressors, distractions and images of perfection that social-media posts provide today, it’s easier than ever to get sucked into the world of comparing yourselves to others. You see people with better jobs, more money, nicer cars, better bodies, and the list goes on and on. Their lives and their accomplishments seem perfect. Because they’re snapshots. 

The question I have for you is how do you begin to push out feelings of being ungrateful and less-than? How can you begin to fill yourself back up so that you squeeze out those negative thoughts? 

My answer - become your own hero. 

What Would Your Older, More Successful Self Tell You

When Matthew McConaughey won his Oscar for Dallas Buyers Club in 2015 his speech was inspiring. He first thanked his mother for teaching him to respect himself so that he could then go out and respect others. He thanked his wife for her unwavering support and love that she...

In the city that I live a very popular chain restaurant just closed. Apparently, it was the lowest performing restaurant in the state and so they decided to shut it down. When I first heard about this I was really shocked. Five years ago if anyone would have told me that this chain would be closing stores, rather than expanding in 2018 I would have bet against you. But the fact remains that times change, tastes change and that nothing is guaranteed. Like the beginning of so many things, opening a new store, starting a new job, and entering into a new relationship the beginning is often filled with excitement, joy, and hope towards a bright future. But, all too often I think we all experience seeing things fail, diminish and not meet the future expectations that we had set in the beginning.

Today, I wanted to get you thinking about the relationships that you currently hold near-and-dear to your heart. Most likely, these relationships that you’re thinking about are family...

Could you imagine what would happen if we got rid of driver's education (ed.) courses for teenagers? Instead of having teenagers prepare for their license we just said, "Here you go" and "Good luck" when they got behind the wheel. It would be a disaster. My son is about two months away from starting driver's ed. and I'm terrified of all the what if's. He's a super responsible and accountable young man and that helps relieve a little bit of the fear, but it still doesn't take away from the fact that you can't always protect him. 

In order to prepare for behind the wheel my son will go through 50 hours of training. I think it's awesome. I wish the requirement were double. 

Now think about your life, your career, your spouse or significant other, your kids, etc. What lessons have you sat down to take in order to prepare yourself for these responsibilities?

If you're like most, you haven't prepared very much. You have shot from the hip and reacted more in your life than...

This past weekend my company hosted a pre-marriage retreat for couples from MN and ND. It was an awesome experience and one that I’ll never forget.  

I’ll never forget it because of the connections and break-throughs that we had with so many couples. Couples struggling with communication challenges, family issues, depression, anxiety, sexual abuse and jealousy.  
Although I could focus on any one of these issues, one connection I made with a young man at the retreat reminded me of the pain and anguish I used to put not only myself through but my wife through when we were first dating and first married. 

To be completely blunt and honest, I was an A#$%HOLE when it came to my wife’s past relationships. I was a jerk. 

Not only would I make her relive those past relationships, but I would then critique her on why she had made such bad decisions.  Thinking about my past behavior - I am really embarrassed. 

Jealousy for me...

Changing your vocabulary and the habitual words you choose to use on a daily basis will, and can, change your world. The way we describe every moment of every day with our internal dialogue and with people we are talking to shapes our experience. 

Was that cat video on YouTube hilarious or was it just silly? Was that movie you watched horrifying or just scary? Is your partner irritating you or driving you bananas? Did you have a phenomenal vacation with your significant other or just a good one? 

Think about swearing and how much we use swearing as "intensifiers" in our language.  For many of my clients swearing is like rocket-fuel. It's one of the reasons I encourage them to be very careful when/if they do swear because it can take them from zero to 60 in just a few seconds.  

Now think for a moment how positive your language patterns are. Would people describe your language as happy-go-lucky with your glass half-full, serious and straight to the point or...